July 18, biopsy day

Well what a fine drizzly day. Today they are going to have another go at getting a tissue sample. I arrive at admission, the usual dance from clerk to clerk, check my papers etc. I always smile because they can't pronounce my name. Ever. 

Anyway, the admission nurse, Deb, went full mother hen mode as she went through her checklists, have you lost weight? Do you have stairs? Have you had falls? I could have had fun but I restrained myself. 

Then the gowning. Who was the sadistic so & so who invented hospital gowns? At least they gave me hospital issue mesh underwear (get your head around that concept!) so my ass wasn't on full display...I caught sight of myself in the mirror as I went past, now picture this: bare feet & legs, dangly blue loose fitting gown, open at the back, bright red hair net cap. Wolf whistle. The catwalks of Paris ain't got nothing on me...

The theatre waiting area, on my trolley with pink side bars. Just perfect.

While waiting to be wheeled in, the walls are plastered with photos of the staff's pets. Mostly cute doggies, it was a nice touch.

Then down to business, into theatre, beeping, screens, bustle & equipment all round. "Just a little prick now" ouch! They put a guide into my mouth which I had to bite on, for the endoscopic ultrasound guide I assume, and then off I went.

I always wonder at this time, under anaesthetic, what happens to the psyche? Does it wander in some misty forest? Does the soul leave the body? Are you vulnerable to spirits? Dunno, I didn't find out. 

What's odd, I think I dreamed. I don't remember that before. I remember shapes, indistinct, nothing else. Probably it was my consciousness making a comeback. When I woke up, you know the first thing I did? I burst into tears. I fucking stated bawling. Like a baby. Poor nurses. The shit they put up with.

Now I'm up on the ward, writing this. I think I'll have a nice bed rest now